Grace full mama

Have you ever read a part of the bible and asked God a few questions about it? I sure have! Ephesians 5:22 has been used in every christian denomination I know of. Wives, submit to your husbands, as to the Lord. Many times I have heard it said as ‘obey,’ and even seen that added into wedding vows. It really feels like a downer, doesn’t it?

The traditional English translation of this verse sounds like “Wives, do whatever your husband says, as if it was God himself speaking.” The way this verse has been interpreted and taught has taken away the voice, and the personal power of a lot of amazing women. It feels like spiritual handcuffs, and makes it very hard to feel truly useful or powerful. Reading that as a teen girl made me feel very less-than. Men were to go to battle and be heroes. They got to wear the armour and put on the war paint. They were called to the great adventure. We women were supposed to keep our mouths shut and make sure they had supper on the table when they got home. If they said ‘jump,’ we were supposed to say ‘how high?’

Here is the problem for me. I am not a natural submitter. Not by a very, very long stretch. I had my own dreams of valiant quests. I wanted to be a warrior princess, strong and courageous and a part of the action. I wanted my own warpaint. I tried very hard to ‘submit’ the way I understood it in my first marriage, and honestly, I regret it immensely looking back. It very much felt like ‘submitting’ was allowing evil to thrive and quietly looking the other way, or picking up the pieces. It caused me to be subject to abuse. It did not feel right at all.

I believe that all scripture is God breathed. I believe that we don’t get to pick and choose what parts of scripture we want to obey. But, I also know that the old testament was written in Hebrew, and the new testament in Greek, and they are far more dynamic languages than English. Sometimes the translation leaves a little bit to be desired.

The word ‘submit’ in Ephesians 5:22 is not the same word as ‘obey.’ It has been mistranslated that way the odd time, and that is really sad, because the real meaning of the Greek word used is an invitation to adventure. We all, as women, want to be part of the greater adventure! We want to be the irreplaceable partner in our husband’s lives, the one they share everything with, the one with whom we live out the quest that is our life together. We want to experience the joy, the peril, the excitement, the conquests that make up a life well lived. We don’t want to be stuck voiceless and opinion-less, barefoot in the kitchen. We want to take on the world with our husbands, hand in hand, sword for sword.

The thing that is easily missed about the Greek word (hupotassomai) that should be used in place of ‘submit’ in this verse, is that it is a military word. It is a verb that is speaking about military formation. The closest that hupotassomai could be translated into English would be “deploy yourself under,” or “arrange yourself in formation under.” It doesn’t mean “you are under.” This makes so much sense, because one chapter later, Paul extends his metaphor and says, For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against the spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places. Therefore take up the whole armour of God, that you may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand. Ephesians 6:12-13

So. We have an enemy. We have a very real, very dangerous, very wicked enemy. And we have been called to battle. We could very easily see Ephesians 5:22 as a call to battle for, and with our husbands! In fact, that’s exactly how we should see it!

Ha. There it is. The adventure we have all been waiting for! The prince and the princess, the king and the queen, the quest where they battle together for the sake of their joint kingdom; we really have been called to that. This is a grand adventure with high stakes, and we are the most important partner of all. We are to go to battle for our husbands. We are to go to battle with our husbands. We are to put on the full armour of God and take our irreplaceable place as a warrior princess in the kingdom of heaven. We get to put on the war paint too. We are not voiceless.

How do we battle? I think this is somewhat individual and depends on what Holy Spirit is speaking to you at the time, but it is an invitation to act on the marching orders you get from him! Pray warfare prayers! Offer accountability. Help him see the battle and fight for you, and for himself. Fight together for your kids. Seek God for your individual destiny and calling, and go for it! What a powerful position we have, as the ones who are called to go to battle against the wiles of the devil with and for our husbands! This is no meek, mild, barefoot in the kitchen life we are called to. We really are called to be a part of the adventure.

Put on your warpaint, sister, your time for battle is here.